Today, I shared a very important and deeply personal essay with my students. Now, sharing essays with my students is certainly not a new thing. Because I believe in modeling expectations, I have shared all kinds of essays with them. But this essay was special. It talked about my concurrent absence of my birth father and my obsession with Barbie dolls. I have been married to my childhood sweetheart now for 11 years, and he has gone through the drama with my father and me, and I have never talked to him about it. When I read the essay to my husband prior to sharing it with the students, he remarked, "That essay explains...everything." YES. I was that deep in that essay.
I was slightly reluctant to share it; again, I was opening a world up to them that hadn't been exposed to them since I started teaching them 2 years ago. Nervously, emotionally, I began to read the piece to my students. As I read, holding back tears, I could not help but notice how captivated they were with my story. The room was so silent, with just my voice bouncing off the walls. Not even a sniffle.
When I finished reading, the room stayed silent. A few shook their heads, and others just stared at me with jaws dropped. They were practicing peer editing with my paper, but they mostly praised my paper and specific diction and syntax I used. A few couldn't help but comment on the tone of sadness in my essay.
As with any lesson plan, the objective is to make sure the students take away something from that day. Generally, my expectation was for the students to get a model for their essay. I think I got much more out of that though. They eventually shoved off the essay and started asking me about my life! We chatted the rest of the period about me. The students said I should write a book. I just might.
Any teacher who does not share some kind of writing with their students is truly missing out on building a classroom climate of respect in that classroom. When teachers share their personal writing with students, they allow to students to see that teacher as a person. A human being with feelings, emotions and pasts that would blow their socks off. Today I was human to them. I was a person who had suffered. I was a person they could relate to. I was a person they felt they could respect because of my struggle. I was something else other than a teacher to them today.
Just as I learn who has lived through abuse, who has no home, who joined a gang, and who stole from a store, they get to know me as a human in return through my writing. Not only do they have better writing because they have an example, it helps me to also build a relationship with them. It is definitely a classroom game changer.
Monday, September 24, 2012
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Making the Case for Gender Education
It takes a man to teach a man. It takes a lady to teach a lady.
My grandmothers taught me to be a lady. One grandmother of mine taught me that you always allow a man to open a door for you if he offers. She taught me that a man should always have a jewel on his arm and that she must look her best at all times. She taught me that you don't even go shopping without putting some lipstick on your lips. My other grandmother taught me that a woman always wears pearls and keeps her nails manicured. They collectively taught me how to take care of children and how to maintain a healthy marriage. I am forever grateful that I had these women in my life.
And while older, seasoned grandmothers are remnants of the past those simple life lessons should still ring true and be passed from generation from generation. However, in this growing age of social media, we are seeing more and more how these snippets of wisdom are fading away into this horrible mess we see in pictures everyday. These days, women are being objectified more than ever, with women paying for enhancements by the plastic load! Women haven't been any closer to being plastic barbie dolls than in this day age! Women have several new stations in life these days: the baby moma, and the object of male desires. Girls are having babies younger because no one is teaching them about their innocence, or daddy isn't around to teach her how not to act from a male perspective.
I can tell when a girl has a daddy in her life most of the time. As a woman who didn't have a daddy in her life, I can relate to the struggle of falling for male affection blindly.
The same can be said for our male population. Who is teaching boys to be chivalrous men? It hurts me to hear how these young boys objectify girls at such a young age: "Oh see's so thick" or calling a girl out of her name if she doesn't give him what he wants.
So, if these students are not learning these things at home, schools should make it an option to allow gender-based character courses. It is imperative that this kind of education is offered so that these students at least have an idea of what is expected of them.
I am excited about the lady and male groups that are being formed at our school. On the female side, we plan to expose these young girls to the expectations of being a young lady in the 21st century. We plan to not only teach them how to care for their appearances, but to teach them compassion by exposing them to community service which deals with children, battered women and women who have lost their way. We plan to not only teach them elegance in stature and diction, but in the way that they carry and present themselves. We also hope to continue the dialogue by inviting their mothers and women who love them to events and culminate with a women's tea. I cannot wait to begin!
A new age of lady will be taking over at our school soon!
My grandmothers taught me to be a lady. One grandmother of mine taught me that you always allow a man to open a door for you if he offers. She taught me that a man should always have a jewel on his arm and that she must look her best at all times. She taught me that you don't even go shopping without putting some lipstick on your lips. My other grandmother taught me that a woman always wears pearls and keeps her nails manicured. They collectively taught me how to take care of children and how to maintain a healthy marriage. I am forever grateful that I had these women in my life.
And while older, seasoned grandmothers are remnants of the past those simple life lessons should still ring true and be passed from generation from generation. However, in this growing age of social media, we are seeing more and more how these snippets of wisdom are fading away into this horrible mess we see in pictures everyday. These days, women are being objectified more than ever, with women paying for enhancements by the plastic load! Women haven't been any closer to being plastic barbie dolls than in this day age! Women have several new stations in life these days: the baby moma, and the object of male desires. Girls are having babies younger because no one is teaching them about their innocence, or daddy isn't around to teach her how not to act from a male perspective.
I can tell when a girl has a daddy in her life most of the time. As a woman who didn't have a daddy in her life, I can relate to the struggle of falling for male affection blindly.
The same can be said for our male population. Who is teaching boys to be chivalrous men? It hurts me to hear how these young boys objectify girls at such a young age: "Oh see's so thick" or calling a girl out of her name if she doesn't give him what he wants.
So, if these students are not learning these things at home, schools should make it an option to allow gender-based character courses. It is imperative that this kind of education is offered so that these students at least have an idea of what is expected of them.
I am excited about the lady and male groups that are being formed at our school. On the female side, we plan to expose these young girls to the expectations of being a young lady in the 21st century. We plan to not only teach them how to care for their appearances, but to teach them compassion by exposing them to community service which deals with children, battered women and women who have lost their way. We plan to not only teach them elegance in stature and diction, but in the way that they carry and present themselves. We also hope to continue the dialogue by inviting their mothers and women who love them to events and culminate with a women's tea. I cannot wait to begin!
A new age of lady will be taking over at our school soon!
Saturday, August 18, 2012
My New Generation of Students
I have now had my new students for 2 weeks. It has been a lot of change and an even bigger adjustment for me, but we are trudging along. I must say I have been pleasantly surprised by these new students of mine. I am particularly excited about my freshman honors class. We were discussing what we were going to read for our literature circles. Usually, when I would introduce the idea of reading, my students have TRADITIONALLY met this statement with disgust! Not my freshmen honors students! Immediately, they began to ransack my shelves! They checked out like thirty books! No kids had ever checked out my books! Ever! This was refreshing! Just imagine what I can do with kids who love to read! I will definitely be rethinking my syllabus with those students!!! I am so excited to teach them.
The other intriguing element to my 2nd week is my AP students. Now that all 21 of them have arrived, I think this will be the class to propel us to the top. These students definitely are trying very hard to learn. I sometimes am taken aback by what they don't know about history or current events, or that they haven't written much, but despite this, these students do attempt to work very hard to find out what they don't know. That is exciting. In addition, I am not missing one single assignment from these students! That is extremely encouraging. I am so excited to get into this curriculum with these juniors- and they seem excited to go there with me.
The one disheartening aspect of my week, however, is that with my standard English students, they have never been made to think. They are so used to people giving them busy work or telling them answers, that they are unaware how they should think. That deeply troubles me. Simple inferences were slightly difficult for them. High stakes testing has taken over, and teaching and learning has lost significant ground to teaching for the test. These students haven't been made to use their minds at all. Using context clues was a struggle for these students. Inferring about a political cartoon was difficult for them. I have my work cut out with them. The upside to this is that, these students are at least willing to try for me and enjoy my class. As long as I build on that enthusiasm, we will get where we need to go. Sometimes in the world of teaching, enthusiasm is everything. If I can just get them to read and truly ponder what they have read and make a judgement about that reading, just imagine what my scores will look like! The process of getting this to happen is where my apprehension lies.
I have my work cut out for me in three different ways, but I totally accept these challenges.
The other intriguing element to my 2nd week is my AP students. Now that all 21 of them have arrived, I think this will be the class to propel us to the top. These students definitely are trying very hard to learn. I sometimes am taken aback by what they don't know about history or current events, or that they haven't written much, but despite this, these students do attempt to work very hard to find out what they don't know. That is exciting. In addition, I am not missing one single assignment from these students! That is extremely encouraging. I am so excited to get into this curriculum with these juniors- and they seem excited to go there with me.
The one disheartening aspect of my week, however, is that with my standard English students, they have never been made to think. They are so used to people giving them busy work or telling them answers, that they are unaware how they should think. That deeply troubles me. Simple inferences were slightly difficult for them. High stakes testing has taken over, and teaching and learning has lost significant ground to teaching for the test. These students haven't been made to use their minds at all. Using context clues was a struggle for these students. Inferring about a political cartoon was difficult for them. I have my work cut out with them. The upside to this is that, these students are at least willing to try for me and enjoy my class. As long as I build on that enthusiasm, we will get where we need to go. Sometimes in the world of teaching, enthusiasm is everything. If I can just get them to read and truly ponder what they have read and make a judgement about that reading, just imagine what my scores will look like! The process of getting this to happen is where my apprehension lies.
I have my work cut out for me in three different ways, but I totally accept these challenges.
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Changes
So this will not take long, and will not be profound. This week, I got new kids. In my career, I have taught two groups of kids. The first group, I had for three years. I taught those kids from 6th grade through 8th. When they went to 9th grade, I left and took my career to a whole new level. The second group I taught for 2 years. They all just became seniors. I grew a lot with those kids. And even though they flattered me this week with the "I miss you" or "Why didn't you go with us", I can't help but have my eyes pinned to the future. I was a pretty decent teacher for those kids. And although it never ceases to amaze me how attached kids can become to you even at your worst, I am a far better teacher now than I had been for both of those groups. Mostly because of them. Naturally, you reflect on mistakes and attempt to right wrongs the second time around, so now that I know better, I have done better. I plan to continue to get better at my craft.
However, change is difficult. And as I see a lot of my old ways fading in the wind, I am allured by this idea of the unknown. The unknown of how well these new students will do for me. The unknown of where my career goes from here. The unknown of....well everything. Even tomorrow. But that unknown is what keeps me going. It is what keeps this fire underneath me to turn from complacency. I have never been more excited than I have been on the cusp of this new year.
So far so good.
However, change is difficult. And as I see a lot of my old ways fading in the wind, I am allured by this idea of the unknown. The unknown of how well these new students will do for me. The unknown of where my career goes from here. The unknown of....well everything. Even tomorrow. But that unknown is what keeps me going. It is what keeps this fire underneath me to turn from complacency. I have never been more excited than I have been on the cusp of this new year.
So far so good.
Monday, July 2, 2012
To the scholars of Sheffield's AP Language course.....
It is with a heavy heart that I must bid you each farewell. It has been a long 2 years, filled with so many valleys to cross and mountains to climb. Yet here we are at life's crossroads. We have served our purposes and now must part. How you all have influenced me! I am a better teacher, and a better person for having made your acquaintances. I have enjoyed every single minute I have spent with each of you. It was filled with happiness and peace. I had worked with low students so long that I had to learn to adjust my practices when working with students who wanted a push. I think I got it now! I had to do some homework and stay just one step ahead of you guys-- but somehow we all got there.
In a few days (July 5th), we will see how well you all did on this AP exam. I am reminded that this isn't a "pass/fail" exam; it is more of "a college level student/ not a college level student" test. Meaning that if you score a 2 or 1, you are still performing on a high school level and if you get a 3 or higher, you are operating on a college level, and thus will receive an AP credit in college. I say all that to say that no matter what your scores are, none of you "failed". You all have grown tremendously as intellectuals, and a scholars, and we must appreciate how much we all grew thanks to this course.
Personally, I also want to leave you all with some parting words. I would have sent them privately, but as always, we learned to learn from each other so each of you will benefit from the other's personal messages:
D.B.- I appreciate you. You make me sick quite often, and I grew restless with your excuses, but you are definitely an articulate, black beauty and I pray you find your balance in order to encompass all of those great qualities at once. You struggled being good at everything at the same time, and that is hard to do. Please always be positive and push yourself to be the best you can be. And try to remember that although extra-curricular activities are fun, your education is a PRIORITY. Don't sleep on your grades, because essentially they can hold you back if you don't do well. Then, what good are the extra-curricular activities if you don't get into college because of your grades? Find your balance and don't run yourself thin this year. Stress is real!
J.A.- Even though we playfully fuss and argue, I want you to know how much I totally respect you. You never cease to amaze me because you are never afraid to step up to any of my challenges: verbally, mentally, etc. When I think you are down and out, you come back with a vengeance! Your test scores ALWAYS show me that you are hearing me, even when I think you aren't! You had one of the highest EOC scores last year. You had the 2nd best writing score this year! You are a force to be reckoned with! I will forever respect you for your willingness to be pushed. I am very proud of you and wish you the best!
A.Bak- Girl, you know you make me crazy. You are one of the most naturally smart students I have taught, yet you are so complacent. I have never understood why you weren't an A student when A's could be so easy for you! Some people would kill to have your thinking capacity. I hope you learn to use it to your advantage soon before you miss out on some very important opportunities that will pass you by if you do not seize upon success in the classroom! As a senior, grades and ACT scores are all that matter! And you are too smart to miss out on what is for you!
A. Bar-You are the definition of brilliance. You will be able to do whatever you want in your life! I hate you will not graduate with your class, but I know you will be valedictorian wherever you go. You can write, you are articulate, you are thoughtful, you are gorgeous! The world will not be able to stop you! I am thankful I was given the opportunity to teach you. I learned very much from you being in my classroom- I learned that there are some students who are ready to be exposed to knowledge! You are designed for very great things.
Y.P.- Yes, when we met I did think you were all about mirrors and make up! Boy did you prove me wrong! You are so smart and so quick to catch onto whatever is thrown your way. I will miss you! I hope you continue to prove people wrong who think you are just another pretty face! You are a kindhearted, intelligent individual. REMEMBER THAT. Too many women are stereotyped because they are pretty and no one takes them seriously in the workplace or in relationships. Continue to be you AND knock down that stereotype for all us pretty women in the world!
A.G.- We spent two very contentious years together. And even though I questioned if you got it or not, I think you did. I have seen you grow so much. IF we can keep your mind on the books and nothing else, I believe you can be great at whatever you do! Do not get lost in the moment of being in high school! Remember that passed May 2013, there is a whole life on the other side of high school! Prepare for that now, by pushing yourself to be the best and honing your abilities. You can do it.
K.W.- I am very glad you took my class this year. You are extremely articulate and I wish I heard your voice more! Continue to find your voice and craft yourself into who you envision yourself to be! Your voice is too important to not be heard, or to get lost in millions of other, more dominant voices. I appreciated every single time we heard your voice because you always had something valid or thoughtful to say!
K.N.- You are so intelligent. When you knew what we were doing, you always gave me some of the most profound responses. Other students stand in awe of you. I don't know where you lost your your way, but please find it so that you can excel to your potential! It is never too late to turn things around!
D.M.- The depth of your knowledge is astounding. I understand this. I respect how immensely intelligent you are. Sometimes I questioned my ability to teach you something new! I lesson planned with you in mind all the time because I wanted to make sure I was pushing you. I realize how easy things are for you, but some of the most beautiful and profound writing that I came across this year, belonged to you! You are probably the smartest individual I have ever come across. I believe that you will receive that 30 on the ACT your heart desires. It just might take you doing more studying for it on your own, because not too many sub-par teachers (including myself) know how to fully teach you. Thank you for allowing me to try to teach you these last two years-- it made me a better educator!
A.T.- You are one of the most complex people I have ever met. I have grown to respect your pursuit of education, when others have found it a nuisance. I have grown to appreciate your thinking processes, when others found you to be a trouble maker. You taught us all that your education is YOUR education and one should never settle for less than the VERY best from those who are in charge of educating you. When it came to us, however, you were too busy still fighting battles and missing the education! I hope that what you did gain from me, will be enough, although I am afraid sometimes it won't be. It is hard to catch up on missed time. Please continue to read to broaden your scope. Continue to question everything, including things you don't think are correct. Read the New Yorker magazine, Time magazine and Newsweek so you can experience the world outside of this city (which is NOT indicative of the world!). Build yourself up mentally so that nobody can ever question your beliefs! I am excited to read and hear about the great things you will accomplish, because you truly are destined for greatness.
A.J.- I hate I didn't teach you two years. But it really didn't matter after awhile because you made up for it by reading everything you could to catch up. I respect and appreciate all of your effort this past year! It was exciting to watch your evolution from regular high school student to high standing intellectual. You pushed yourself to be a more dignified writer, and never, ever settled for less. I was excited to see you disappointed about 7s, although your peers all got 5s and 6s. I saw you strive to be better, and you were. No matter who teaches you, continue to feed your thirst for knowledge. Sheffield is sleeping on you! Make everybody wake up around you! You are not just "another black girl". You are one who is going to be something real special when you get where you are going!
C.C.- The lone gentleman. I am so glad I was given an opportunity to teach you. I have seen your ability expand by leaps and bounds! I cannot express how grateful I am that you stuck in there. That you continued to push, push, push to keep up with your female counterparts. Maturity comes with your days, so it'll all balance out eventually. Thank you for hanging in there, because we all know you didn't have to. Thank you for constantly letting me know you appreciated my long nights and early mornings planning lessons in order to teach you. You took it all in! Every piece of information I gave you. Continue to be that adamant about your education! Do not allow another person to fluff over your education because it will be YOUR loss, not theirs! And be who you think you want yourself to be. We cannot live for our peers' or teachers' or parents' approval. We can only live to our own potential. Just keep YOUR BAR HIGH so you can reach YOUR goals. Expectations are everything. You must have high expectations for yourself in order to push yourself to greatness.
S.B.- You hold a very special place in my heart. You are one of the most insightful and kind people I have ever met. I appreciate that you always tried to push yourself to keep up with the pace. You never counted yourself out. Ever. Now, if you would go through senior year without letting trivial stuff get you in a rut, you will finish the top of your class and be headed for greatness! Continue to read!
A.R.- Utter brilliance. I wish that your home life didn't interfere as much with your school life because I imagine what you could be like if you were there everyday. You have a gift! The raw gift of thinking. I pray that with this new legislation (that you were so worried about) you will receive the college education you DESERVE. Please make your education a priority!
S.W.- I think I believe in your intellectual ability more than you do! You are so smart, and I wish you wouldn't be afraid of it. You are destined for great things and I need you to believe that as much as I do! Stop 2nd guessing yourself and believe that you know what you know! Rebuke laziness and procrastination because it holds you back from your greatness! READ, READ, READ and think about what you read. You are extremely bright and quietly beautiful, inside and out! Believe those things about yourself.
D.P.- You are still with me. Sitting in your seat, every single day. Thank you for being in my life for 1 1/2 years. I always stood in awe of you. Your intelligence, your prowess on the race track, your humility. There is not one thought of you that crosses my mind that does not make me overwhelmed with tears. We were robbed of such a wonderful human. But honestly, the good have always died young. And all geniuses have their vices. Some die of drugs because they cannot calm their minds without it. Some die because they were at the wrong place at the wrong time, trying to have a life outside of their intelligence. You were definitely the latter. How I wish you didn't go to that party that night. Your cryptic tweet, "Everybody is sleep- I will sleep when I die" still haunts me, because I wish you would've slept that Christmas Eve. Then you could've awakened Christmas morning to get that laptop you wanted (and needed) so badly. Instead of receiving eternal sleep. I will always remember that time in Nashville when you read Huck Finn all day every day, when everybody on the trip were having fun. You were one of the most self-disciplined students I have ever met, and EVERYBODY stands to learn something from that. You refused to ever be left behind, even if it meant staying after school, or missing a track practice in order to do your work. ON YOUR OWN FREE WILL. Nobody told you to do these things. You did them to appease your own standards. Incomparable. There will never be another like you. However, I know you are with me. And that you guide my meditations of how to teach your classmates better than I was taught. I miss your voice, but you will always be there. And I thank God for the little acquaintance that we did have, because I am a better person for having met you.
Parting is such sweet sorrow. I will miss you all in my class as my students. However, I am at peace with the thought that you all operate on higher standards now. Please do not settle for anybody who refuses to teach you. Always make the people being paid to educate you, work. It will be to your detriment if you decide to become complacent in anything involving your education. Remember that, seniors. And whatever you do READ, READ, READ. Never stop reading. There is so much you have not read that your non-black counterparts will have read! You have to constantly read in order to keep up!!!! The world outside of Sheffield is filled with intellectual beasts that you will soon have to compete with for jobs and stature. You cannot lose that war, because you all are our talented tenth! Expose yourselves to life outside of Sheffield by READING.
It has been a wonderful year. And I will miss each of you differently. You all have formed and molded me into a better teacher and I cannot wait to try this thing again with my NEW AP class!! Thank you all for taking that educational journey with me.
In a few days (July 5th), we will see how well you all did on this AP exam. I am reminded that this isn't a "pass/fail" exam; it is more of "a college level student/ not a college level student" test. Meaning that if you score a 2 or 1, you are still performing on a high school level and if you get a 3 or higher, you are operating on a college level, and thus will receive an AP credit in college. I say all that to say that no matter what your scores are, none of you "failed". You all have grown tremendously as intellectuals, and a scholars, and we must appreciate how much we all grew thanks to this course.
Personally, I also want to leave you all with some parting words. I would have sent them privately, but as always, we learned to learn from each other so each of you will benefit from the other's personal messages:
D.B.- I appreciate you. You make me sick quite often, and I grew restless with your excuses, but you are definitely an articulate, black beauty and I pray you find your balance in order to encompass all of those great qualities at once. You struggled being good at everything at the same time, and that is hard to do. Please always be positive and push yourself to be the best you can be. And try to remember that although extra-curricular activities are fun, your education is a PRIORITY. Don't sleep on your grades, because essentially they can hold you back if you don't do well. Then, what good are the extra-curricular activities if you don't get into college because of your grades? Find your balance and don't run yourself thin this year. Stress is real!
J.A.- Even though we playfully fuss and argue, I want you to know how much I totally respect you. You never cease to amaze me because you are never afraid to step up to any of my challenges: verbally, mentally, etc. When I think you are down and out, you come back with a vengeance! Your test scores ALWAYS show me that you are hearing me, even when I think you aren't! You had one of the highest EOC scores last year. You had the 2nd best writing score this year! You are a force to be reckoned with! I will forever respect you for your willingness to be pushed. I am very proud of you and wish you the best!
A.Bak- Girl, you know you make me crazy. You are one of the most naturally smart students I have taught, yet you are so complacent. I have never understood why you weren't an A student when A's could be so easy for you! Some people would kill to have your thinking capacity. I hope you learn to use it to your advantage soon before you miss out on some very important opportunities that will pass you by if you do not seize upon success in the classroom! As a senior, grades and ACT scores are all that matter! And you are too smart to miss out on what is for you!
A. Bar-You are the definition of brilliance. You will be able to do whatever you want in your life! I hate you will not graduate with your class, but I know you will be valedictorian wherever you go. You can write, you are articulate, you are thoughtful, you are gorgeous! The world will not be able to stop you! I am thankful I was given the opportunity to teach you. I learned very much from you being in my classroom- I learned that there are some students who are ready to be exposed to knowledge! You are designed for very great things.
Y.P.- Yes, when we met I did think you were all about mirrors and make up! Boy did you prove me wrong! You are so smart and so quick to catch onto whatever is thrown your way. I will miss you! I hope you continue to prove people wrong who think you are just another pretty face! You are a kindhearted, intelligent individual. REMEMBER THAT. Too many women are stereotyped because they are pretty and no one takes them seriously in the workplace or in relationships. Continue to be you AND knock down that stereotype for all us pretty women in the world!
A.G.- We spent two very contentious years together. And even though I questioned if you got it or not, I think you did. I have seen you grow so much. IF we can keep your mind on the books and nothing else, I believe you can be great at whatever you do! Do not get lost in the moment of being in high school! Remember that passed May 2013, there is a whole life on the other side of high school! Prepare for that now, by pushing yourself to be the best and honing your abilities. You can do it.
K.W.- I am very glad you took my class this year. You are extremely articulate and I wish I heard your voice more! Continue to find your voice and craft yourself into who you envision yourself to be! Your voice is too important to not be heard, or to get lost in millions of other, more dominant voices. I appreciated every single time we heard your voice because you always had something valid or thoughtful to say!
K.N.- You are so intelligent. When you knew what we were doing, you always gave me some of the most profound responses. Other students stand in awe of you. I don't know where you lost your your way, but please find it so that you can excel to your potential! It is never too late to turn things around!
D.M.- The depth of your knowledge is astounding. I understand this. I respect how immensely intelligent you are. Sometimes I questioned my ability to teach you something new! I lesson planned with you in mind all the time because I wanted to make sure I was pushing you. I realize how easy things are for you, but some of the most beautiful and profound writing that I came across this year, belonged to you! You are probably the smartest individual I have ever come across. I believe that you will receive that 30 on the ACT your heart desires. It just might take you doing more studying for it on your own, because not too many sub-par teachers (including myself) know how to fully teach you. Thank you for allowing me to try to teach you these last two years-- it made me a better educator!
A.T.- You are one of the most complex people I have ever met. I have grown to respect your pursuit of education, when others have found it a nuisance. I have grown to appreciate your thinking processes, when others found you to be a trouble maker. You taught us all that your education is YOUR education and one should never settle for less than the VERY best from those who are in charge of educating you. When it came to us, however, you were too busy still fighting battles and missing the education! I hope that what you did gain from me, will be enough, although I am afraid sometimes it won't be. It is hard to catch up on missed time. Please continue to read to broaden your scope. Continue to question everything, including things you don't think are correct. Read the New Yorker magazine, Time magazine and Newsweek so you can experience the world outside of this city (which is NOT indicative of the world!). Build yourself up mentally so that nobody can ever question your beliefs! I am excited to read and hear about the great things you will accomplish, because you truly are destined for greatness.
A.J.- I hate I didn't teach you two years. But it really didn't matter after awhile because you made up for it by reading everything you could to catch up. I respect and appreciate all of your effort this past year! It was exciting to watch your evolution from regular high school student to high standing intellectual. You pushed yourself to be a more dignified writer, and never, ever settled for less. I was excited to see you disappointed about 7s, although your peers all got 5s and 6s. I saw you strive to be better, and you were. No matter who teaches you, continue to feed your thirst for knowledge. Sheffield is sleeping on you! Make everybody wake up around you! You are not just "another black girl". You are one who is going to be something real special when you get where you are going!
C.C.- The lone gentleman. I am so glad I was given an opportunity to teach you. I have seen your ability expand by leaps and bounds! I cannot express how grateful I am that you stuck in there. That you continued to push, push, push to keep up with your female counterparts. Maturity comes with your days, so it'll all balance out eventually. Thank you for hanging in there, because we all know you didn't have to. Thank you for constantly letting me know you appreciated my long nights and early mornings planning lessons in order to teach you. You took it all in! Every piece of information I gave you. Continue to be that adamant about your education! Do not allow another person to fluff over your education because it will be YOUR loss, not theirs! And be who you think you want yourself to be. We cannot live for our peers' or teachers' or parents' approval. We can only live to our own potential. Just keep YOUR BAR HIGH so you can reach YOUR goals. Expectations are everything. You must have high expectations for yourself in order to push yourself to greatness.
S.B.- You hold a very special place in my heart. You are one of the most insightful and kind people I have ever met. I appreciate that you always tried to push yourself to keep up with the pace. You never counted yourself out. Ever. Now, if you would go through senior year without letting trivial stuff get you in a rut, you will finish the top of your class and be headed for greatness! Continue to read!
A.R.- Utter brilliance. I wish that your home life didn't interfere as much with your school life because I imagine what you could be like if you were there everyday. You have a gift! The raw gift of thinking. I pray that with this new legislation (that you were so worried about) you will receive the college education you DESERVE. Please make your education a priority!
S.W.- I think I believe in your intellectual ability more than you do! You are so smart, and I wish you wouldn't be afraid of it. You are destined for great things and I need you to believe that as much as I do! Stop 2nd guessing yourself and believe that you know what you know! Rebuke laziness and procrastination because it holds you back from your greatness! READ, READ, READ and think about what you read. You are extremely bright and quietly beautiful, inside and out! Believe those things about yourself.
D.P.- You are still with me. Sitting in your seat, every single day. Thank you for being in my life for 1 1/2 years. I always stood in awe of you. Your intelligence, your prowess on the race track, your humility. There is not one thought of you that crosses my mind that does not make me overwhelmed with tears. We were robbed of such a wonderful human. But honestly, the good have always died young. And all geniuses have their vices. Some die of drugs because they cannot calm their minds without it. Some die because they were at the wrong place at the wrong time, trying to have a life outside of their intelligence. You were definitely the latter. How I wish you didn't go to that party that night. Your cryptic tweet, "Everybody is sleep- I will sleep when I die" still haunts me, because I wish you would've slept that Christmas Eve. Then you could've awakened Christmas morning to get that laptop you wanted (and needed) so badly. Instead of receiving eternal sleep. I will always remember that time in Nashville when you read Huck Finn all day every day, when everybody on the trip were having fun. You were one of the most self-disciplined students I have ever met, and EVERYBODY stands to learn something from that. You refused to ever be left behind, even if it meant staying after school, or missing a track practice in order to do your work. ON YOUR OWN FREE WILL. Nobody told you to do these things. You did them to appease your own standards. Incomparable. There will never be another like you. However, I know you are with me. And that you guide my meditations of how to teach your classmates better than I was taught. I miss your voice, but you will always be there. And I thank God for the little acquaintance that we did have, because I am a better person for having met you.
Parting is such sweet sorrow. I will miss you all in my class as my students. However, I am at peace with the thought that you all operate on higher standards now. Please do not settle for anybody who refuses to teach you. Always make the people being paid to educate you, work. It will be to your detriment if you decide to become complacent in anything involving your education. Remember that, seniors. And whatever you do READ, READ, READ. Never stop reading. There is so much you have not read that your non-black counterparts will have read! You have to constantly read in order to keep up!!!! The world outside of Sheffield is filled with intellectual beasts that you will soon have to compete with for jobs and stature. You cannot lose that war, because you all are our talented tenth! Expose yourselves to life outside of Sheffield by READING.
It has been a wonderful year. And I will miss each of you differently. You all have formed and molded me into a better teacher and I cannot wait to try this thing again with my NEW AP class!! Thank you all for taking that educational journey with me.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Violent Past for Murder Suspect | MyFoxMemphis | Fox 13 News
Violent Past for Murder Suspect | MyFoxMemphis | Fox 13 News
I don't usually blog about things not educationally centered, but this story grinds my gears. How, on this green Earth, can Tennessee explain the intelligence of granting bond to a man who violated his parole? How, in the hell, was this man allowed to be free AFTER robbing and attempting to kill someone, AFTER shooting up a home???
I don't usually blog about things not educationally centered, but this story grinds my gears. How, on this green Earth, can Tennessee explain the intelligence of granting bond to a man who violated his parole? How, in the hell, was this man allowed to be free AFTER robbing and attempting to kill someone, AFTER shooting up a home???
Sunday, December 25, 2011
The Death of Innocence: For DP
I lost a student I really loved today. As I sit here, finally able to compose myself enough to write my thinking, and to rebuke the anger I have for the cowards who murdered her, I can't help but think about the larger issue at hand: how her death casts a glaring bright light on this generation of cowardly men the black community is raising. Although all the facts haven't emerged, I do know she was senselessly killed and the killers are still on the run. More than likely in Memphis, still able to live their meaningless lives, eat turkey, live merrily..... and I know the adage that says what goes around comes around (which I call an adage and not a cliche simply because I know this is true), that still does not heal our hearts or ease our minds, because as cold-blooded as her murder was, these monsters still live among us. It is quite sickening to say the least.
The real question at hand that I am grappling with is this: What kind of man are we raising? How in the world is it manly to get into an argument and then retaliate the argument by shooting up a car on the expressway? How could you, on Christmas mind you, form your mind to make the decision to execute people in that fashion? How can you have no conscience or second thoughts about possibly ending someone's life?
As we all wait for the dust to settle, we (as an urban community) must question the future of our people and the cities we live in. When innocent bystanders are killed due to unmerciful ignorance, we have to question where the heck we went wrong? I listen to the radio, and you hear more and more songs that glorify not having commitments, but instead "just calling her boo". We are telling young men it is ok to run a muck and make babies, and not care for them, and in essence be womanizers. We are allowing boys to shoot rather than think or walk away from, or hell even use your damn fist rather than ending a promising life. We are letting cowards roam among us when we don't tell who we see committing these heinous acts. We are raising a generation of weak men.
I think about the young men at my school. They wear skinny jeans that sag, yet get "attitudes" with us when we ask them to pull them up. Let's not even begin to talk about the sagging in the first place which is clearly jail culture anyway. They video tape fights. The hit their girlfriends. They release videos of inappropriate activities with these girls. They curse the women teachers. If they get in a fight, it is never one-on-one; it is always 30 against 1, which spirals to 30 against 30. They brag on the robberies or deaths that occurred over the weekend as one discusses the weather.
This generation of men is so weak mentally. And there is no deference to human life whatsoever.
This is a huge problem. It is an issue that their fathers are not around (boy there is a huge difference in the ones that do have dads at home). It is an issue that they have no feelings- none for the women who teach them, raise them or love them. How have we raised these boys who are so cold to emotions? The oxymoron is that in the ghettos, emotive men are weak, when in fact, killing a person over an argument is the thing that is weak. What happened to our culture of men? More importantly, is this situation too far gone where there is nothing we can do except wonder which innocent bystander is next?
I have lived through so much young death, I have become immune to it. I have had many friends killed. And over and over again, we get ourselves together and say nothing. But this one stings for me the most. She was going somewhere, and there is no doubt about that. She was a talent mentally and physically and extremely mature. She had her ticket out of this life to break those oppressive chains that hold our community back in poverty. And in a blinking of an eye, that whole life is vanquished. And here we sit, red eyed not sure what to do and missing her like crazy.
All I wonder is when will the revolution on our own parenting skills and our own men be televised? Echoing Sojourner Truth, if it took Eve to cast us all into eternal sin, clearly women will have to be the ones to right the wrongs of our sons. It will take us to lay down responsibly when conceiving these children; it will take raising them with a man around; it will take us to teach right from wrong; it will take us teaching them when it is appropriate to stand up for themselves with dignity and not cowardice; it will take us exposing them to the fact that life is a gift and you never have that right to take anybody's life. It will take us all.
Her death casts this ugly shadow in the urban community on how our boys are slowly extinguishing our race. And the white bigots and Willie Lynch Jrs are just laughing at us as it happens. The rate we are going, our race won't be a problem much longer.
---to DP with all my love and respect.
The real question at hand that I am grappling with is this: What kind of man are we raising? How in the world is it manly to get into an argument and then retaliate the argument by shooting up a car on the expressway? How could you, on Christmas mind you, form your mind to make the decision to execute people in that fashion? How can you have no conscience or second thoughts about possibly ending someone's life?
As we all wait for the dust to settle, we (as an urban community) must question the future of our people and the cities we live in. When innocent bystanders are killed due to unmerciful ignorance, we have to question where the heck we went wrong? I listen to the radio, and you hear more and more songs that glorify not having commitments, but instead "just calling her boo". We are telling young men it is ok to run a muck and make babies, and not care for them, and in essence be womanizers. We are allowing boys to shoot rather than think or walk away from, or hell even use your damn fist rather than ending a promising life. We are letting cowards roam among us when we don't tell who we see committing these heinous acts. We are raising a generation of weak men.
I think about the young men at my school. They wear skinny jeans that sag, yet get "attitudes" with us when we ask them to pull them up. Let's not even begin to talk about the sagging in the first place which is clearly jail culture anyway. They video tape fights. The hit their girlfriends. They release videos of inappropriate activities with these girls. They curse the women teachers. If they get in a fight, it is never one-on-one; it is always 30 against 1, which spirals to 30 against 30. They brag on the robberies or deaths that occurred over the weekend as one discusses the weather.
This generation of men is so weak mentally. And there is no deference to human life whatsoever.
This is a huge problem. It is an issue that their fathers are not around (boy there is a huge difference in the ones that do have dads at home). It is an issue that they have no feelings- none for the women who teach them, raise them or love them. How have we raised these boys who are so cold to emotions? The oxymoron is that in the ghettos, emotive men are weak, when in fact, killing a person over an argument is the thing that is weak. What happened to our culture of men? More importantly, is this situation too far gone where there is nothing we can do except wonder which innocent bystander is next?
I have lived through so much young death, I have become immune to it. I have had many friends killed. And over and over again, we get ourselves together and say nothing. But this one stings for me the most. She was going somewhere, and there is no doubt about that. She was a talent mentally and physically and extremely mature. She had her ticket out of this life to break those oppressive chains that hold our community back in poverty. And in a blinking of an eye, that whole life is vanquished. And here we sit, red eyed not sure what to do and missing her like crazy.
All I wonder is when will the revolution on our own parenting skills and our own men be televised? Echoing Sojourner Truth, if it took Eve to cast us all into eternal sin, clearly women will have to be the ones to right the wrongs of our sons. It will take us to lay down responsibly when conceiving these children; it will take raising them with a man around; it will take us to teach right from wrong; it will take us teaching them when it is appropriate to stand up for themselves with dignity and not cowardice; it will take us exposing them to the fact that life is a gift and you never have that right to take anybody's life. It will take us all.
Her death casts this ugly shadow in the urban community on how our boys are slowly extinguishing our race. And the white bigots and Willie Lynch Jrs are just laughing at us as it happens. The rate we are going, our race won't be a problem much longer.
---to DP with all my love and respect.
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