Today, I shared a very important and deeply personal essay with my students. Now, sharing essays with my students is certainly not a new thing. Because I believe in modeling expectations, I have shared all kinds of essays with them. But this essay was special. It talked about my concurrent absence of my birth father and my obsession with Barbie dolls. I have been married to my childhood sweetheart now for 11 years, and he has gone through the drama with my father and me, and I have never talked to him about it. When I read the essay to my husband prior to sharing it with the students, he remarked, "That essay explains...everything." YES. I was that deep in that essay.
I was slightly reluctant to share it; again, I was opening a world up to them that hadn't been exposed to them since I started teaching them 2 years ago. Nervously, emotionally, I began to read the piece to my students. As I read, holding back tears, I could not help but notice how captivated they were with my story. The room was so silent, with just my voice bouncing off the walls. Not even a sniffle.
When I finished reading, the room stayed silent. A few shook their heads, and others just stared at me with jaws dropped. They were practicing peer editing with my paper, but they mostly praised my paper and specific diction and syntax I used. A few couldn't help but comment on the tone of sadness in my essay.
As with any lesson plan, the objective is to make sure the students take away something from that day. Generally, my expectation was for the students to get a model for their essay. I think I got much more out of that though. They eventually shoved off the essay and started asking me about my life! We chatted the rest of the period about me. The students said I should write a book. I just might.
Any teacher who does not share some kind of writing with their students is truly missing out on building a classroom climate of respect in that classroom. When teachers share their personal writing with students, they allow to students to see that teacher as a person. A human being with feelings, emotions and pasts that would blow their socks off. Today I was human to them. I was a person who had suffered. I was a person they could relate to. I was a person they felt they could respect because of my struggle. I was something else other than a teacher to them today.
Just as I learn who has lived through abuse, who has no home, who joined a gang, and who stole from a store, they get to know me as a human in return through my writing. Not only do they have better writing because they have an example, it helps me to also build a relationship with them. It is definitely a classroom game changer.
Monday, September 24, 2012
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Making the Case for Gender Education
It takes a man to teach a man. It takes a lady to teach a lady.
My grandmothers taught me to be a lady. One grandmother of mine taught me that you always allow a man to open a door for you if he offers. She taught me that a man should always have a jewel on his arm and that she must look her best at all times. She taught me that you don't even go shopping without putting some lipstick on your lips. My other grandmother taught me that a woman always wears pearls and keeps her nails manicured. They collectively taught me how to take care of children and how to maintain a healthy marriage. I am forever grateful that I had these women in my life.
And while older, seasoned grandmothers are remnants of the past those simple life lessons should still ring true and be passed from generation from generation. However, in this growing age of social media, we are seeing more and more how these snippets of wisdom are fading away into this horrible mess we see in pictures everyday. These days, women are being objectified more than ever, with women paying for enhancements by the plastic load! Women haven't been any closer to being plastic barbie dolls than in this day age! Women have several new stations in life these days: the baby moma, and the object of male desires. Girls are having babies younger because no one is teaching them about their innocence, or daddy isn't around to teach her how not to act from a male perspective.
I can tell when a girl has a daddy in her life most of the time. As a woman who didn't have a daddy in her life, I can relate to the struggle of falling for male affection blindly.
The same can be said for our male population. Who is teaching boys to be chivalrous men? It hurts me to hear how these young boys objectify girls at such a young age: "Oh see's so thick" or calling a girl out of her name if she doesn't give him what he wants.
So, if these students are not learning these things at home, schools should make it an option to allow gender-based character courses. It is imperative that this kind of education is offered so that these students at least have an idea of what is expected of them.
I am excited about the lady and male groups that are being formed at our school. On the female side, we plan to expose these young girls to the expectations of being a young lady in the 21st century. We plan to not only teach them how to care for their appearances, but to teach them compassion by exposing them to community service which deals with children, battered women and women who have lost their way. We plan to not only teach them elegance in stature and diction, but in the way that they carry and present themselves. We also hope to continue the dialogue by inviting their mothers and women who love them to events and culminate with a women's tea. I cannot wait to begin!
A new age of lady will be taking over at our school soon!
My grandmothers taught me to be a lady. One grandmother of mine taught me that you always allow a man to open a door for you if he offers. She taught me that a man should always have a jewel on his arm and that she must look her best at all times. She taught me that you don't even go shopping without putting some lipstick on your lips. My other grandmother taught me that a woman always wears pearls and keeps her nails manicured. They collectively taught me how to take care of children and how to maintain a healthy marriage. I am forever grateful that I had these women in my life.
And while older, seasoned grandmothers are remnants of the past those simple life lessons should still ring true and be passed from generation from generation. However, in this growing age of social media, we are seeing more and more how these snippets of wisdom are fading away into this horrible mess we see in pictures everyday. These days, women are being objectified more than ever, with women paying for enhancements by the plastic load! Women haven't been any closer to being plastic barbie dolls than in this day age! Women have several new stations in life these days: the baby moma, and the object of male desires. Girls are having babies younger because no one is teaching them about their innocence, or daddy isn't around to teach her how not to act from a male perspective.
I can tell when a girl has a daddy in her life most of the time. As a woman who didn't have a daddy in her life, I can relate to the struggle of falling for male affection blindly.
The same can be said for our male population. Who is teaching boys to be chivalrous men? It hurts me to hear how these young boys objectify girls at such a young age: "Oh see's so thick" or calling a girl out of her name if she doesn't give him what he wants.
So, if these students are not learning these things at home, schools should make it an option to allow gender-based character courses. It is imperative that this kind of education is offered so that these students at least have an idea of what is expected of them.
I am excited about the lady and male groups that are being formed at our school. On the female side, we plan to expose these young girls to the expectations of being a young lady in the 21st century. We plan to not only teach them how to care for their appearances, but to teach them compassion by exposing them to community service which deals with children, battered women and women who have lost their way. We plan to not only teach them elegance in stature and diction, but in the way that they carry and present themselves. We also hope to continue the dialogue by inviting their mothers and women who love them to events and culminate with a women's tea. I cannot wait to begin!
A new age of lady will be taking over at our school soon!
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