Left Everything I Had in My Classroom

God truly orders steps. Every part of my career has been guided in a linear fashion. I have been blessed to touch children who could not read and kids who read everything. I have taught the kids who were told they couldn't be anything to students who have dreamed they could have it all despite where they came from. I have taught motherless children and children who have one parent and those who have have been blessed with two. I have taught gang members and students who have lost their way. I have lost students. I have taught students who don't eat at night. I have taught Valedictorians. I have taught Cum Laudes. I have taught "Thank you lawdies". I have taught students who have gone on to college, and students who played athletics in college; I have taught them all. My teaching life has been encompassed with love and sorrow and frustration and grief and jubilation and triumph.

Teaching is who I am. It has been the fabric of my life since I was a little girl teaching teddy bears. 

But no matter how good of a teacher I may be and people tell me I am, success sometimes alludes me. Mostly because success in teaching is generally measured in test scores. The AP test drives what I do because I teach at a school where students are not successful on this exam. I spend countless hours planning, creating, and studying in order to give my students the best information possible. It is my firm belief that students must be conditioned to be thinkers and problem solvers, regardless of what they choose to be in life, whether it be a neurosurgeon or a garbage man. Teaching to the test has defeated this goal for several graduating classes in the past decade. We have taught memorization and repetition of fact. Regurgitation. Rarely do we allow students to think for themselves, formulate their own opinions, and draw their own conclusions. Rarely do we hear their voices and understand their personalities. Classrooms have sucked the identity and individuality out of these students for the sake of schools passing tests for No Child Left Behind. But in all actuality we have left scores of children behind.

Advanced Placement courses are sometimes urban students' last chances at having a worthwhile education. And while I cannot speak for all, I know that I have tried my best to prepare my students for the exam and life after school. I tried to expose them. I pushed them. I talked with them. I laughed with them. I tried to help them grow. And each year, when scores come back, I try to reflect and use my summer to reinvent my curriculum. Whether these students receive a 3, 4, or 5, or not, I am always largely satisfied with my efforts. I know I left everything I had in that classroom.

Last year (2011-12), I had a group of students who adored me. I had taught those students two years and I could do no wrong in their eyes. And even though they gave me their all, the entire class received "2s" and I pulled one "3". I was proud of myself because there had never been a passing score in either English course at my school for many years. It was also my first year teaching the course, and I took those scores as evidence that I was doing something right.

Thus, I began preparing for a new set of kids. Initially, I had in my mind I was only going to teach 14 or 15 students. I had an "AP Workout Session" for sophomores where I got to see them analyze text and discuss their thinking about it. I selected 15 I thought I could roll with. I was nervous because I hadn't taught them two years and would have a lot of ground to cover; however, once I began teaching them, I was pleasantly surprised. The students seemed very eager, and generally did everything that was asked of them. And as the class numbers staggered to 24, I saw students flourish and others buckle under the pressure. I even had students quit.

At the end of the day, I believe I have done all I could for those students. No matter what the scores say, I believe I have done everything I could and that each and every one of the 22 students I ended with learned something from me. I found innovative ways to teach them and for them to teach each other. There were some concepts I could have spent more time on. I could have assigned less and spent more time to go deeper on their writings. Mental notes that will guide me through next year. But it is my firm belief that every student in my AP class this year had a place there and a role to play, not only in my classroom, but also for my overall pedagogical practices, and in my life. Considering all of those factors, I believe that I gave these kids a legitimate chance.The fruits of my labor will be revealed Wednesday evening when the scores arrive. Whether I get one passing score, or several, or none, I know the students who took me are better off from doing so.

Even though I will teach these students again next year for AP Literature, I would like to reflect on each student who stepped up to the challenge of taking this adventure with me:

D.C.- Girl, I don't know what to say about you. I remember meeting you for the first time formally in the AP workout session. I thought you were so cliche, and just said stuff you thought I wanted to hear. Your diction made me cringe. I decided to pass on you because I wanted some time to work on you in Honors. God really works in mysterious ways because I ended up not teaching Honors, and you ended up approaching me on the elevator asking me to give you a chance. I am so glad things worked that way because I was so impressed with your efforts this year! You grew so much. Your speaking flourished, your writing improved, even your reasoning skills matured. Granted, the ghetto still resides in you, but it doesn't seem to define you academically, which is what we all strive for as Black Americans. While you need to practice more self control, hopefully you matured over the summer because AP Lit will be a challenge for you.

R. Gi- I was impressed with you from the day I met you during the blitz. I learned to appreciate your will to do better and your work ethic. Whatever I threw your way, you seemed to pick up on it very quickly. I wish you would have started with us from the beginning, but AP Lit will be your opportunity to show everybody what you can do!

R. Go- I have a special place in my heart for you. I am unsure why you didn't end up in my class other than your attendance, but you came to me in September and told me you wanted to take my class. I was so impressed by that. You were so soft spoken, but anything you added to the class discourse was always valuable. While I needed to see you more, you were definitely a great writer, and I saw you get better and better by the day. I need to see you MORE (like everyday this year ma'am) but I look forward to working with you again next year.

J.G.- I met you in 9th grade in study hall, and I remember thinking you were a jock lol. You had some pretty decent scores though, so there was no doubt in my mind that you were going to take my class. However in August, I started hearing rumors that you were not going to take me! I couldn't believe it. I don't know what changed your mind, but I know I am thankful that the change occurred. You were truly one of my best. I am confident that you did learn from me, and that others learned from you, to the point that I believe that you should pass that exam! Even if you don't, I am still satisfied that you are a better student for having taken me rather than not. I am so glad you did not take the easy way out because you wouldn't have learned anything that way!

S.H.- Little Miss Attitude herself! You try so hard. I have been very proud of you. We have work to do to improve your scores, and it will take some hard work and effort on your part, but I believe we will do it. Just keep working hard, DO ALL YOUR WORK ON TIME, and we will get you where you are trying to go. And read, read, read.

P.H.- We go back. Coach use to tell me about you coming to Sheffield in 9th grade and I felt bad because I couldn't teach you then. You came by and spoke every day, nonetheless. I didn't learn your worth until the AP Workout session. You absolutely shined and I was very impressed with your discussion and comprehension skills. You did your work, and you grinded all year honing your writing skills. We have one more year to get you where you are trying to go!

D.I.- I think you ended up on my roster by accident. I remember you telling me at the end of tenth grade you wanted to take AP History instead of AP Lang. Students know what they are best at so I didn't push. But some how some way, you ended up in my classroom. You earned my respect very early on; I offered you the opportunity to change your schedule, but you decided to stick around. Next year, I will spend more one on one time with your writing, but for the most part, I was very proud of the progress you made.

A.J.- You are the hardest working little lady I know! You worked hard all year. I promise to slow down what I am doing and work more with your writing this year. That is a promise. I know I forgot about you sometimes. I saw your thinking develop and mature throughout the year, and I was encouraged by that. You were so positive and enthusiastic about everything, even times we were all discouraged. I want to stress to you that you will need to read everything you get your hands on this year in order to pass this exam!

J.J.- You are so quiet spoken, but you are very intelligent and a very inquisitive thinker. I wish you would speak up more often, but I believe you don't because for some reason you seem to lack confidence in what you know. I request that you read more about what is going on around you. And write more. Pay attention to new words and try to use them as you learn them. I have been very proud of you, but this year I think we are going to see a real breakthrough from you.

R.L.- Lazy, lazy, LAZY lol. I can tell school had been easy for you. This year was a challenge for you only because your laziness and procrastination made it a challenge. I appreciated your skill, because I really only had to show you something once or explain something to you once, and generally you could pick it up. That is the sign of a true genius. If we can rebuke the spirit of laziness out of you, I promise we will get you where you are trying to go. You are truly gifted intellectually, but you are holding yourself back when you don't devote your best thinking to your work. Last minute thinking is not ever your best thinking.

X.M.- I respect your intellectual aptitude. Perhaps you will allow your actions to match the awesomeness of your brain soon!

C.M.- If I haven't told you this before, I will say it now: you are going to be a force to be reckoned with. With a little more honing of your craft and thinking, you are going to be one of the best Sheffield has graduated. I want you to read more, I want you to write more. Keep being informed and speaking your mind. You are such a fabulous person overall! Keep your priorities in check (i.e., your attendance and your tendency to turn stuff in late) and you will be unstoppable. While I was told you were arrogant, I believe there is nothing wrong with confidently knowing what you are capable of. Just make sure you have truly arrived or you will give off a bad impression!

M.M.- There is so much I could say about you, but I do not have the space. You were a wild card coming into the class. You hadn't been in Honors, but your English teacher swore you needed to take me. Usually I am a challenge for students, but you were most definitely a challenge to me. I had to learn to challenge your thinking and force you to broaden your scope, and you forced me to reconsider how many trees I was killing off. I have made some changes in that area for next year (although not very many, but some considerations). I was proud of your growth. You also produced some very stylistic writings throughout the year, and I am proud you give me credit for pulling that out of you. You are going to be a phenomenal writer; the key is to be open to other points of view, but also being confident in what you have READ, and RESEARCHED, because what you hear is not usually accurate. I look forward to one more year with you to push you to the max! (P.S. with your new ACT score, you can take Comp I and II. Be sure to bring your score sheet to me in the fall).

B.P.- When I read over your application May of 2012, I remember reading that you didn't care what class you took. I took that as a sign of weakness, and thus said, well Honors for him. God had other plans when you somehow ended up in one of my seats. I remember being instantly enthralled by your creative writing and blogging. You always gave us something to think about. And while you never said much during those Socratic seminars, you always said something profound. The workload was hard on you, but somehow you forced yourself to make it. I cannot imagine what the class would have been without you in it, so I am very pleased you stepped up to the challenge.

 C.R.- What a great guy you are! You never quit and you always rise to a challenge, no matter the obstacle. And your knowledge of words has grown by leaps and bounds! The more you read and question words, the better you will be. I remember when you tried it at first and you were just using words any kind of way, but with your continued hard work and the maturation of your thinking, you are now a pro. Isn't it amazing what education can do? You were the embodiment of what educating an individual looks like! Watching you evolve from the silly junior in August, to the dignified, well-spoken senior you are about to be this August has been compelling. I am scared of what you will be next August on your way to college! I know you have been discouraged with your multiple choice frustrations, but I think I have figured out how to help you now, because from the day you asked me to help you with it, (and admittedly I didn't really know how), I've been dedicating thinking to what I really could do to help. I hope it works, but I have a great guinea pig to figure this out! Keep up the great work and being who you are.

M.R.- You are the only student in history that I had to practically beg to take my course. Usually when a student tells me they don't want to take AP, I leave them alone because a student know what they are truly willing to do. But I just KNEW if I touched your brain just a little, you would be an intellectual little monster! I believe in your skill, and your intellectual capabilities. I believe if you did assignments on time you would have come a little farther, but we learn lessons and try to do better the next time around, so hopefully that will be the case this year as we try this again. You brought insightful and creative thinking to all of our discussions and I truly do appreciate that because it made all of those around you think a little harder. Thank you for your contributions to everyone's success.

A.S.- I bet you sit on some valuable wisdom. I wish you would speak out and speak up more and demonstrate your thinking for everyone, but believe it or not somebody has to be in the background being the brains rather than being the voice. But you are remarkably smart. I remember reading your first essay "The Complexities of Me" and thinking that I could really mold you into the quintessential AP student. Your way with words astounded me very early on! You lost your way sometimes, and was a horrific procrastinator at times, but you got it. While you cheat yourself of truly great thinking when you do wait to the last minute, the quality of your work somehow wasn't significantly diminished because you still produced phenomenal work. Imagine what it could have been had you done things on time. Just a thought. But this year, we have to hear more from you, because your thinking sometimes challenged those around you and that is a mark of true genius.

K.S.- Within the short time you were a part of the course, I was impressed with your thinking. You are truly intelligent! Hopefully you will improve your work ethic in order to reap all the benefits of an AP class.

L.T.- We didn't start off together because I kept missing you last Spring, but I am glad you decided to take the course. You try very hard and always bring different views to conversations. You virtually were the best at turning work in close to on time, and with each paper I saw you get better, and better, and better. Next year, we will spend more one-on-one time with your multiple choice testing and vocabulary because those are the only two elements still holding you back!

K.T.- I have so much to say about you that I really don't know where to start. I have known you academically since 9th grade. You are the only one in this junior class about whom I can say that. I was never impressed. I felt you did the bare minimum in order to not push yourself to do more than you needed to to get by. Then you ended your sophomore year telling me you were not going to read because you hate to and I remember thinking that I had my work cut out working with you. The problem with not reading and not pushing yourself is a limitation of style, thinking, and basically condemning yourself to being basic. But you pushed yourself this year. I still am not convinced you read like I wanted you to, but you did more than you did in the past. I will take victories as they come. I was finally impressed with your writing because you finally took yourself out that basic box. I saw your thinking expand. And then I saw you evolve as an overall person. The secret is that I hate reading too, but I realize it as a necessary evil, and in that respect, you remind me of a male version of myself. Next year will be a challenge for you because the entire course IS reading, but if you really want a 30 on the ACT, you will realize it has to be done. I believe you can be the male Valedictorian we have been waiting for at Sheffield for these past 4 years.

T.W.- Girl, we have come a long way. Your writing just soared! You might be the epitome of double consciousness because you learned to write with correct diction and style and then be who you are outside of that. As minorities period, we have to learn to take ourselves out of our writing and learn to be formal academically, and be who we are to the core outside of that.I hope you speak up more next year and really learn to curve your personality in school a little more, but I definitely see your potential.

I appreciate each of you, and no matter what the scores say, we did everything we could and in our efforts we can feel successful. We will do this again in a month! 

My Love Affair with D'Jango Unchained

I am a lover of stories. Preferably of whimsical tales of yore, or one with turns and twists. I love heroes; I especially love when the underdog wins. I crave a believable, succinct plot.

My need for a story with a plot with no holes in it is why I hate Tyler Perry movies, simply because his plots leave a lot to be desired! Black cinema leaves a lot to be desired period. I don't want a story of black, everyday life drama: the down and out mom, struggling to find love while raising her kids; the gangster tales; the cheating husband; the comedian in drag parading as an old grandma or ghetto chick. Of course, as is the case of "black trailblazers" we pay homage to these movies because they were the firsts of their kinds, and in the case of School Daze, Malcolm X and Boyz in the Hood, masterpieces, but more often than not pandering to what makes money. And while we have had our Tyler Perry and Spike Lee and John Singleton, none has produced that one whimsical, fantasy, tale of a black hero. There has been no tale of adventure, love, struggle and history all wrapped together in one movie sitting told from the black experience. And I have waited, loving instead the stories of Sherlock Holmes and all the others Hollywood has given me instead.

I have finally been given my black hero tale. I have been given all my heart has desired in a movie!

I will be honest. When I first heard of the movie Django, I felt it was going to be a Catcher Freeman-esq film with some slave with super powers and he goes around self-righteously killing white slave owners as far as the eye could see. You Boondocks fans know who Catcher Freeman is, and can identify with my angst. Clearly, a slave hero would be all we need him to be: cunning, strong, manly, compassionate, loving, and fighting for his freedom.

Django is my new hero. He was everything I envisioned a hero slave man to be. He was wise beyond measure; the same wisdom Jim had in Huckleberry: a slave but wise nonetheless. His character was realistic, and outlined the paradox of his existence. And when he chose his royal blue outfit! I believe I could see that being a truthful occurrence! He did everything he could to save his lady love, and had her at the tales end. The plot was so dead on, Django managed to have a foil in Stephen, Sam L. Jackson's version of a head house slave who loves his master. Nothing in the plot was left to chance, and the well placed suspense kept you wondering what was next! A brutal killing, or a laugh. The sarcasm and satire was abundant, even poking fun at the early KKK. The writing was fantastic; the music was well-placed and perfectly selected. There wasn't much this movie lacked.

Jamie Foxx as Django was superb. At first, it was hard for me to accept that he could portray a character of this magnitude, as I keenly remember his stand-up and In Living Color days. Even the Academy Award didn't make me a believer, and he beat out some heavy hitters such as Johnny Depp, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Clint Eastwood. Fox is just absolutely gifted as an actor, and I believe this movie solidified his standing. Foxx's D'Jango ousts Downey's Sherlock Holmes, which prior to today, ranked as one of the best performances by an actor to me. I love Heath Leger's Joker, Joaquin Phoenix's Mr. Watson, Kelsey Grammar's Robert Langdon, among other heroes or villains. And boy do I love a good villain! Disney's Maleficent in Sleeping Beauty is by far the most menacing villain in the repertoire. Yes. I have a sick, twisted affinity for villains. Leonardo DiCaprio's Calvin Candie was brilliant. You wanted to hate evvvvvverything about him, but the Southernly Gentleman in him made you slightly forgive him. He was what a young slave owner probably looked like: renegade, above the law, charming, psychotic. The quintessential slaver. Who was Mandingo fighting.... Absolutely brilliant acting. DiCaprio was said to have struggled with the harsh language and some of the scenes, but you would have never known because he was Calvin Candie.

While I could not watch many graphic parts of this film, and the use of the word "nigger" made me flinch several times, it was necessary. Slavery was gruesome and horrible and heartbreaking. Clearly understating this would have been to the detriment of the film.

It is a wonderful slave tale. If you are looking for homage, or a documentary, or something to be entered to the discussion on slave matters, this movie is not it. While people feel this movie is insensitive or disrespects our ancestors, I beg to differ. Every culture has its hero in cinema. None of them has looked like me. Slave culture unfortunately is our culture; how have we gone this long with no slave hero? We have no Don Quixote. No Three Musketeers. No Robin Hood. We now have our Romanticised slave story.

As is expected of Quintin Tarantino, he delivered a Tarantino film. He gave us a romantic fantasy, equipped with the dark humor that is a Tarantino creation. It had its parts where you did not want to laugh (such as the character of Samuel L. Jackson and his ridiculous cursing) but couldn't help it, and parts where you could not laugh. Every emotion imaginable could have been experienced. It was 2 hours and 45 minutes of master cinema.

The Reemergence Of Dialect

While the quote, "In order to know where you are going, you have to know where you've been" is totally cliche, when it comes to this new generation's language these days, it totally is fitting. In all honesty, some of these children sound like what I envision a slave sounded like. Yes. A slave. And in some cases, they are killing the language so bad that the slaves themselves are probably turning in their graves. How in the world did our language backslide to dialect?

On any given day, I can hear a student say some of these things:
"Is you gone stop playin gurl?"
"Boy who is you talkin too?"
"What happenin foo?"
"Why is you actin green fo?"

Earlier this week, I confiscated a note from a student. I needed another student to translate it for me. I suppose it was written in English, but it was so hard to read:

"Ma gurl got ha fone cut off. Ha moma b on sum bs. Ah ain't gonna call her no mo."

I wish they knew how closely they sounded like slaves.

Zora Neale Hurston, queen of writing dialect, made it her business to capture the language of African Americans in the 20s and 30s. Here are a few passags from her short story, "The Guilded 6 Bits":

"Humph! Ah'm way behind time t'day! Joe gointer be heah 'fore Ah git mah clothes on if Ah don't make haste."

"Ah ain't, Joe, not lessen you gwine gimme whateve' it is good you got in yo' pocket. Turn it go, Joe, do Ah'll tear yo' clothes."

"Lemme git dat paper sak out yo' pocket. Ah bet it's candy kisses."
"Tain't. Move yo' hand. Woman ain't got no business in a man's clothes nohow. Go way."

Yeah. So my students sound just like this. I really do not know what else to say.

The Truth May Hurt for a Little While But a Lie Hurts Forever.

A few days ago, I virtually emasculated my AP students. While I have noticed (for several weeks) that they had not been reading, the silence between questions went from "gears turning in their minds"......to eery......to downright telling. These students should have seriously read the piece we were discussing at least twice. So at first I was slightly perplexed as to why it was taking them that long when it should have just been a REREAD. Until I realized many were reading it for the first time. I've been in this teaching game 10 years now, and I have taught 5th grade up through college, so I know what silence means. Generally, I would tell them I knew they were faking and hadn't read, but this got under my skin this time.

It cut me deep.

It felt like a splinter that was stuck in a finger for hours because there were no tweezers to dig it out. It stung like a wasp's sting. A persistent sting that no matter how hard you wish for it to go away, it just remains. So, in retailiation of my sting, I told my students the truth that no one likes to tell them.

I told them how they know nothing, and they tend to be very content with that. I say content because they CHOOSE not to better themselves. I say content because I don't see the willingness to push themselves, so they are complacent. They seem content to be the best at "our school". That bothers me. Because no student from the inner city can ever be content with anything because as we are fighting to have good ACT scores, or FIGHTING to have higher AP scores, there is a world on the other side of Poplar where Memphis' brightest and best dwell. They read the newspaper. They read the classics. They read and watch the news. They know allusions. They are knowledgeable of current events. They thirst for knowledge. They talk about college at their dinner tables. They read for fun. College is NOT an option with the kids at Central and White Station. They are going, and if students at Sheffield are not careful, they will be working FOR them. I wish they knew the curriculum at a private school or boarding school where all students take AP courses. I wish they knew how easily a 25 or a 27 or a 29 on the ACT is to these students.

In light of all this, I would be remiss as my student's teacher to allow complacence. There is too much at stake. So I told them the truth. I told them that at those other schools, they would be in honors courses. I told them that in reality, they are average right now. To be fair, it isn't their fault entirely. They have had some not so great, uncaring teachers who have limited their intelligence. But, if you choose to never better yourself by READING, then that is YOUR fault. 90% of what I have learned in my life has been by my own efforts: by reading in my spare time. I also adamatly stated that I am not in the business of teaching at their pace. I am not in the business of teaching an average student who wishes to remain that way. I am in the business of working with the serious scholar and pushing them to make a statement to this community. I want my students to show the community here in Sheffield and across this city that Sheffield is capable of turning out the brightest and the best! And I am determined to prove it.

Do not take my class if you are looking for an A. You must earn the A after all of the hoops and mazes I will put you through to get the A. And you will be proud of that A if you do in fact earn it.

Do not take my class if you read for enjoyment. I need students who read for knowledge, and thus your feelings will be hurt. We read nothing but material that will make you think.

Do not take my class if you are not going to do my work. I spend many hours away from my boys to put lessons together that you will enjoy. Don't disrespect or waste my hours I spend on you by not doing my work.

Do not take my class if you don't make yourself understand what you read. You must read for information.

Do not take my class if you are not serious. We are in the middle of a war. A war against the stereotype that Sheffield is the dumping ground in East Memphis. I am the general and I promise you, you will not get shot if you just follow my directions. In fact, following my directions will give you life.

Better yet, I am the coach of this team and I am looking for my squad who I can take to the championship. I am not looking for a playoff team. I deal with winners.

I hope that students know that I am not the average teacher. Therefore, I don't deal with "average" students. There are plenty of other teachers to take that do tolerate this subpar behavior. May even be happy with that because it is so much better than their average students. I told them to feel free to take one of those teachers. I deal with movers and shakers. I deal with dreamers. I deal with doers. To take me is a badge of honor and I intend to keep it that way. And my ship will continue to sail whether you are on the vessel or not. I will love you still, but lose respect for you because it is a shame to see a student give up on him/herself. And sometimes the easy route is the route lazy people must take.

The truth hurts for a little while. But I refuse to lie to them and make them think their actions to not progress is acceptable. They will thank me when they get into the colleges they wish to attend. And they will thank me when all the skills they learned now helps them to compete in three years with their college peers.

I'm good. Hopefully they will be too.

Through to My Soul: Teacher Writing in the Classroom

Today, I shared a very important and deeply personal essay with my students. Now, sharing essays with my students is certainly not a new thing. Because I believe in modeling expectations, I have shared all kinds of essays with them. But this essay was special. It talked about my concurrent absence of my birth father and my obsession with Barbie dolls. I have been married to my childhood sweetheart now for 11 years, and he has gone through the drama with my father and me, and I have never talked to him about it. When I read the essay to my husband prior to sharing it with the students, he remarked, "That essay explains...everything." YES. I was that deep in that essay.

I was slightly reluctant to share it; again, I was opening a world up to them that hadn't been exposed to them since I started teaching them 2 years ago. Nervously, emotionally, I began to read the piece to my students. As I read, holding back tears, I could not help but notice how captivated they were with my story. The room was so silent, with just my voice bouncing off the walls. Not even a sniffle.

When I finished reading, the room stayed silent. A few shook their heads, and others just stared at me with jaws dropped. They were practicing peer editing with my paper, but they mostly praised my paper and specific diction and syntax I used. A few couldn't help but comment on the tone of sadness in my essay.

As with any lesson plan, the objective is to make sure the students take away something from that day. Generally, my expectation was for the students to get a model for their essay. I think I got much more out of that though. They eventually shoved off the essay and started asking me about my life! We chatted the rest of the period about me. The students said I should write a book. I just might.

Any teacher who does not share some kind of writing with their students is truly missing out on building a classroom climate of respect in that classroom. When teachers share their personal writing with students, they allow to students to see that teacher as a person. A human being with feelings, emotions and pasts that would blow their socks off. Today I was human to them. I was a person who had suffered. I was a person they could relate to. I was a person they felt they could respect because of my struggle. I was something else other than a teacher to them today.

Just as I learn who has lived through abuse, who has no home, who joined a gang, and who stole from a store, they get to know me as a human in return through my writing. Not only do they have better writing because they have an example, it helps me to also build a relationship with them. It is definitely a classroom game changer.

Making the Case for Gender Education

It takes a man to teach a man. It takes a lady to teach a lady.

My grandmothers taught me to be a lady. One grandmother of mine taught me that you always allow a man to open a door for you if he offers. She taught me that a man should always have a jewel on his arm and that she must look her best at all times. She taught me that you don't even go shopping without putting some lipstick on your lips. My other grandmother taught me that a woman always wears pearls and keeps her nails manicured. They collectively taught me how to take care of children and how to maintain a healthy marriage. I am forever grateful that I had these women in my life.

And while older, seasoned grandmothers are remnants of the past those simple life lessons should still ring true and be passed from generation from generation. However, in this growing age of social media, we are seeing more and more how these snippets of wisdom are fading away into this horrible mess we see in pictures everyday. These days, women are being objectified more than ever, with women paying for enhancements by the plastic load! Women haven't been any closer to being plastic barbie dolls than in this day age! Women have several new stations in life these days: the baby moma, and the object of male desires. Girls are having babies younger because no one is teaching them about their innocence, or daddy isn't around to teach her how not to act from a male perspective.

I can tell when a girl has a daddy in her life most of the time. As a woman who didn't have a daddy in her life, I can relate to the struggle of falling for male affection blindly.

The same can be said for our male population. Who is teaching boys to be chivalrous men? It hurts me to hear how these young boys objectify girls at such a young age: "Oh see's so thick" or calling a girl out of her name if she doesn't give him what he wants.

So, if these students are not learning these things at home, schools should make it an option to allow gender-based character courses. It is imperative that this kind of education is offered so that these students at least have an idea of what is expected of them.

I am excited about the lady and male groups that are being formed at our school. On the female side, we plan to expose these young girls to the expectations of being a young lady in the 21st century. We plan to not only teach them how to care for their appearances, but to teach them compassion by exposing them to community service which deals with children, battered women and women who have lost their way. We plan to not only teach them elegance in stature and diction, but in the way that they carry and present themselves. We also hope to continue the dialogue by inviting their mothers and women who love them to events and culminate with a women's tea. I cannot wait to begin!

A new age of lady will be taking over at our school soon!

My New Generation of Students

I have now had my new students for 2 weeks. It has been a lot of change and an even bigger adjustment for me, but we are trudging along. I must say I have been pleasantly surprised by these new students of mine. I am particularly excited about my freshman honors class. We were discussing what we were going to read for our literature circles. Usually, when I would introduce the idea of reading, my students have TRADITIONALLY met this statement with disgust! Not my freshmen honors students! Immediately, they began to ransack my shelves! They checked out like thirty books! No kids had ever checked out my books! Ever! This was refreshing! Just imagine what I can do with kids who love to read! I will definitely be rethinking my syllabus with those students!!! I am so excited to teach them.

The other intriguing element to my 2nd week is my AP students. Now that all 21 of them have arrived, I think this will be the class to propel us to the top. These students definitely are trying very hard to learn. I sometimes am taken aback by what they don't know about history or current events, or that they haven't written much, but despite this, these students do attempt to work very hard to find out what they don't know. That is exciting. In addition, I am not missing one single assignment from these students! That is extremely encouraging. I am so excited to get into this curriculum with these juniors- and they seem excited to go there with me.

The one disheartening aspect of my week, however, is that with my standard English students, they have never been made to think. They are so used to people giving them busy work or telling them answers, that they are unaware how they should think. That deeply troubles me. Simple inferences were slightly difficult for them. High stakes testing has taken over, and teaching and learning has lost significant ground to teaching for the test. These students haven't been made to use their minds at all. Using context clues was a struggle for these students. Inferring about a political cartoon was difficult for them. I have my work cut out with them. The upside to this is that, these students are at least willing to try for me and enjoy my class. As long as I build on that enthusiasm, we will get where we need to go. Sometimes in the world of teaching, enthusiasm is everything. If I can just get them to read and truly ponder what they have read and make a judgement about that reading, just imagine what my scores will look like! The process of getting this to happen is where my apprehension lies.

I have my work cut out for me in three different ways, but I totally accept these challenges.